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Typical Spoon™ application usage

Part 1: Eating Cereals

Firstly, make sure that you have selected the correct Spoon™ according to the grading of the appropriate cereal, then proceed as follows:

  1. Obtain a cereal friendly officially approved bowl.
  2. Open the cereal storage and transport box. As designs vary, consult instructions supplied with your cs/t.
  3. Pour cereal into bowl.
  4. Open your milk transportation harness (these may vary, bottle or carton. Remember that faulty milk cartons can leak, so consult a qualified milkman if you are unsure on the correct procedures).
  5. Pour milk into bowl, taking care to avoid spillage as this may cause harm and often offends.
  6. Remove Spoon™ from anti-static protective packaging.
  7. Move Spoon™ in motion perpendicular to the moon (or sun) in a clockwise motion towards the bowl away from the operator.
  8. As Spoon™ enters bowl, ensure that you obtain a reasonable cargo load (utilising the bulbous holster area). Expand oral cavity area to give sufficient clearance for the Spoon™ and its cargo.
  9. Place Spoon™ bulbous holster area and cargo only into sustenance reception area. Do not attempt to load the cargo carrying handle into this area as convulsions and/or discomfort may occur.
  10. Deposit the cargo into the sustenance reception area utilising the Lateral Intake Positioning System (L.I.P.S.™) to obtain maximum food/dribble ratio.
  11. Remove empty sustenance harness.
  12. Contract the oral cavity area.
  13. Chew the food in a counter clockwise motion.
  14. Swallow.
  15. Repeat steps 7 through 15 until bowl is empty.
  16. Wash your Spoon™ after use. Use only approved detergent and water. Do not use industrial solvents or bleaches. Do not bend or burn, even after use.

The procedure for eating soup is the same as for eating cereals, except that it is different.

Warning: Whilst utilising the oral cavity area, take care to inhale using alternative respiratory techniques.

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